warning signs for men...

Warning signs for MEN when SHE needs HIS love the most:

SHE FEELS SHE MAY SAY

overwhelmed "there is so much to do"

insecure "i need more"

resentful "i do everything"

worried "but what about..."

confused "i don't understand why..."

exhausted "i can't do anything more"

hopeless "i don't know what to do"

passive "i don't care, do what you want"

demanding "you should..."

withholding "no, i don't want to..."

mistrustful "what do you mean by that?"

controlling "well, did you...?"

disapproving "how could you forget...?"

sigh...

there are times i want to escape...
forget everything...
and live the life i've been wanting to have...

best of friends...

"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."





"You're...
My Friend,
my companion,
through good times and bad
my friend, my buddy,
through happy and sad,
beside me you stand,
beside me you walk,
you're there to listen,
you're there to talk,
with happiness, with smiles,
with pain and tears,
I know you'll be there,
throughout the years!"

cross stitching

whenever i am depressed and feeling alone i just turned to my cross stitch...

my marrying age is 24

[/] I know how to make a pot of coffee.
[/] I keep track of dates using a calendar.
[ ] I own more than one credit card.
[ ] I know how to change the oil in my dads car.
[/] I do my own laundry.
[ ] I vote every election.
[/] I can cook for myself.
[ ] I think politics are exciting.
[ ] I balance my checkbook.
[ ] My parents have better things to say than my friends.

total: 4

[ ] I show up for school/college/work every day early.
[/] I always carry a pen in my pocket/purse
[ ] I've never gotten a detention
[/] I have never smoked a cigarette.
[ ] I have never gotten completely trashed.
[ ] I have forgotten my own birthday at least once.
[/] I like to take walks by myself.
[/] I've watched talk shows.
[/] I know what 'credibility' means without looking it up.
[ ] I drink coffee at least once a week.

total: 5

[/] I know how to do the dishes
[/] I can count to 10 in another language.
[/] When I say I'm going to do something I do it
[ ] My parents trust me.
[ ] I can mow the lawn.
[ ] I can make adults laugh without being stupid
[/] I remember to water the plants.
[/] I study when I have to.
[/] I pay attention at school/college.
[ ] I remember to feed my pets.

total: 6

[/] I can spell 'experience' without looking it up
[/] I work out on a regular basis.
[/] I clean up my own mess.
[ ] The people at Gloria Jeans know me by name.
[ ] my favorite kind of food is take out.
[ ] I have gained weight since middle/high school.
[ ] The first thing I do when I wake up is get caffeine.
[ ] I cant go out of the store without getting something I don't need.
[/] I understand political jokes the first time they are said.
[/] I can type quickly.

total: 5

[/] I have realized that the weather forecast changes every hour.
[ ] My only friends are from my place of employment.
[ ] I have been to a tupperware party
[ ] I have realized that no one will take you seriously unless you are over the age 25 and have a job.
[ ] I have more bills than I can pay.
[/] Most of my friends are older than I am.
[/] I can say no to staying out all night.
[/] I use the internet every day.
[ ] My wardrobe hasn't changed in a while.
[ ] I can read a book and actually finish it.

total: 4

TOTAL SCORE: 24

tattoed on my mind

Maybe you’ll soon forget about all
Or maybe you’ll miss it like I do
One thing’s for sure, I’m all knocked out
I spend too much time thinking of you

[chorus]
And I can’t get you out of my dreams
Now I know that you’re the dangerous kind
And your face is tattooed on my mind
Coz I can’t get you out of my dreams

I don’t wanna write
I don’t wanna call
I would not know what to say
It should be you
That’s how I want it to be
Tel me you feel the same way

[repeat chorus]

[adlib]

Oh yesterday I was feeling safe
All I do today is try to be brave
And no melody can seem to soothe my mind
Now I curse you for being so sweet and so kind

[repeat chorus]

Yes I know you’re tattooed
On my mind you’re tattooed

at last...

" i will praise you, for you have answered me, and have become my salvation." Psalm 118:21

Reminders:

- God's word is true.

- God can part the sea.

- God can heal the incurable.

- God can provide water from a rock and manna fron the heavens.

- God can conquer your enemies.

- God can still deliver from the fiery furnace and the lion's den.

Persevere in what He has asked you to do today because your rewards will be greater than you can think or imagine.


PERSEVERANCE IS

THE ROPE THAT

TIES THE SOUL TO

THE DOORPOST

OF HEAVEN. (Frances J. Roberts)

men are like rubber bands

Men are like RUBBER BANDS. When they pull away, they can stretch only so far before they come springing back. A Rubber Band is the perfect methapor to understand the male intimacy cyle. This cycle involves getting close, pulling away, and then getting close again.

Most women are surprised to realize that even when a man loves a woman, periodically he needs to pull away before he can get closer. Men instinctively feel this urge to pull away. It is not a decision or choice. It just happens. It is neither his fault nor her fault. It is a natural cycle.

Women misinterpret a man's pulling away because generally a woman pulls away for different reasons. She pulls back when she has been hurt and is afraid of being hurt again, or when he has done something wrong and disappointed her.

Certainly a man may pull away fro the same reasons, but he will also pull away even if she has done nothing wrong. He may love and trust her, and then suddely he begins to pull away. Like a stretched rubber band, he will distance himself and then come back all on his own.

A man pulls away to fulfill his need for independence or autonomy. When he has fully stretched away, then instantly he will come springing again. Automatically he will be more motivated to give his love and receive the love he needs. When a man springs back, he picks up the relationship at whatever degree of intimacy it was when he stretched away. He doesn't feel any need for a period of getting reacquainted again.

- John Gray, Ph. D.

a funny divorce letter

Dear Wife:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.

These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us as husband and wife.

Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.

Your EX-Husband


P.S. Don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving awa y
to West Virginia together! Have a great life!




Dear Ex-Husband -

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's
true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a far cry from what you've been.

I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work.

I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment.

And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.

About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the
$49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed that it was a
coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me
that morning.

A fter all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess.

I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me. So take care.


Signed,

Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell and Free

sigh...

" if you look inside a girl's (h - e - a - r - t)

You would see how much she really cries

You'll find secrets hidden, bestfriends and lies.

But what you'll see the most is how *hard* it really is to stay when nothing is ever right and everything is always wrong."

the problem with HE as thought by SHE

got this from ate cristy's posted bulletin in friendster...just wanna share in here also...see for yourself

=======================================================================

If u TREAT him nicely, he says u are IN LOVE with him;
If u Don't, he says u are PROUD.


If u DRESS Nicely, he says u are trying to LURE him;
If u Don't, he says u are from VILLAGE.


If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN ;
If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS .


If u are SMARTER than him, he'll lose FACE;
If he's Smarter than u, he is GREAT.


If u don't Love him, he tries to POSSESS u;
If u Love him! , he will try to LEAVE u.(very true huh?)


If u don't MAKE LOVE with him., he says u DON'T LOVE him;
If u DO!! He says u are CHEAP.


If u tell him your PROBLEM, he says u are TROUBLESOME;
If u DON'T, he says that u don't TRUST him.


If u SCOLD him, u are like a NANNY to him;
If he SCOLDS u, it is because he CARES for u.


If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot beTRUSTED;
If he BREAKS his, he is FORCED to do so.


If u SMOKE, u are BAD girl;
If he SMOKES, he is GENTLEMAN.


If u do WELL in your exams, he says it's LUCK;
If he does WELL, it's BRAIN.


If u HURT him, u are CRUEL;
If he HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!!


"uuuhhmmm i know a guy who is completely like HE "

parang kau pero hindi...

'got this from someone's blog in multiply...

She is a 24-year old copywriter. He is an architect. They met and became lovers in college. They broke up last year but remained to be "friends." They send sweet text messages and he calls her often to make sure she's okay. They still date. They still have sex. They don't see anyone else. It is obvious that they still love each other but when asked about their situation, she doesn't know the real score. Even her friends are in the dark. "Parang sila, pero hindi."

She works in a telecom. He is reviewing for the board. They are in the same barkada. They talk on the phone till 4 am. He gives her chocolates, flowers and CDs even when there is no occasion. Their friends are suspecting something. Bakit sila nagsosolo kapag may overnight inuman? Why does he hold her close on the dance floor? Bakit sila magkaholding hands lagi? Sila kaya? "He hasn't admitted anything," she rants. "But I let him hug and kiss me. Parang kami, pero hindi."

They work together in an ad agency. After office, they would watch movie, have dinner and stroll at Glorietta. She gave him Harry Potter books for his birthday in exchange for posing as her boyfriend to make an ex jealous. They made out during the company outing in Subic and never talked about it. He said "I love you" once but she wasn't sure if she heard him correctly because they were both drunk then. But one thing she is sure of is her feelings for him. She likes him. And she's assuming that with what he's doing to her and with her, he likes her, too. There's just one hitch: he has a girlfriend!

She is a 28-year-old virgin. He's a 35-year-old bachelor. Both mountaineers, they became close during their climbs. After a few dates in posh restaurants, he brings her to his condo where they would make out. They have been doing this for months. She wants to believe that "sila na" but then she's not really sure about it. "We don't talk about it but it doesn't really matter," she'd tell her friends. "What's important is I am enjoying this -- whatever it is."

She's a teacher and he's an engineer. they've known each other since they were young then got reacquainted after a decade. they go out and make out. endless text messages and calls until 4 am. he picks her up from work. Her friends are asking what's going on. she can't say "yes" why? meron syang girlfriend. pero parang kami, PERO hindi.

The "parang kayo, pero hindi" stage. Others call it MU or mutual understanding. Pseudo-relationships. Pseudo-boyfriends. Flings. Almost like a relationship, but not quite. It is a phase where the persons involved are more than friends, but not quite lovers.Puwedeng may verbal agreement, puwedeng wala. One or both of you may have admitted your feelings, possible ding hindi. You just let your gestures do the talking for you. Walang pormal na ligawan na nangyari. Hindi kayo mag-dyowa. Pero sa kilos niyo, sa mga sinasabi niyo, parang kayo, pero hindi.

This kind of "relationship" can happen at different stages for different reasons. It can happen after a break-up. You still love each other, and you want to be with each other but you broke up for a reason. And for reasons hat you alone know, ayaw niyo na muna magkabalikan.It can also happen before a relationship, iyong pareho kayong nakikiramdam. Possible din na ayaw niyo munang mag-seryoso kaya kunwa-kunwarian lang muna. Testing lang.

Puwede ring hindi puwedeng maging kayo kasi isa sa inyo --usually the guy --may ka-relasyon na. Kaya habang hindi pa siya nakikipag-break doon sa girl (sabi niya makikipag-break siya soon pero di naman niya ginagawa), wala muna kayong relasyon para nga naman hindi siya nangagaliwa kasi "hindi naman kayo."

This pseudo-relationship stage, for a time, can be fun. Lalo na kung naghahanap ka lang naman ng "kalaro." Pero huwag ka lang mag-e-expect na may patutunguhan kayo kasi wala talagang kasiguraduhan. So bakit ang daming nagse-settle sa ganitong set up ganoong hindi naman sigurado kung may patutunguhan? Iba't ibang dahilan. Puwedeng for fun lang. Puwedeng "buti na iyan kesa w ala" or puwede na iyang "pantawid-gutom." Meaning, habang wala pa iyong the real thing, doon muna sa kunwa-kunwarian.


For those who are not in a serious relationship, they would think that pseudo-relationship is better than no relationship at all. It would be fun, if all you are after for is that "kilig" feeling.

Aminado naman ako na once upon a time, may mga pseudo-relationships din ako. No commitments involved. For the simplest reason that they couldn't commit, because they were either committed to someone else, or that they weren't ready to commit.

My rationalization, "okay na iyun, kesa wala."


Ang habol ko lang naman, iyong kilig feeling. Iyong merong nagtatanong kung kumusta araw ko. Iyong merong ka-cuddle sa beach outing. Iyong kapag tumunog ang cellphone, mapapangiti na ako dahil alam kong galing sa kanyang message. Iyong merong laging kasama. Habang wala pa ang the real thing, puwede na itong pagtiyagaan.


But then I learned that although it was only a pseudo-relationship, the emotions were real. And usually, in this kind of set up, ang babae lagi ang lugi.

Una, you can't ask him to commit. Since it's not really a relationship, you can't demand commitment from your partner. Ano ba kayo? May K ka nga ba magpasundo ng hatinggabi? You will always be uncertain about your role in his life. You can't expect him to be always there with you. And if you feel jealous of the other girls, you just have to keep it to yourself. Ano ka ba niya para magselos?


Pangalawa, what if you fall deeply in love with him? You can't be sure if he feels the same way. Baka nag-a-assume ka lang na mahal ka rin niya. Even if you are dying to tell him you love him, you can't. Because you're not sure if he'll like it. Baka mapahiya ka lang. This stage will always make you wonder where you are in the relationship. Or if there is a relationship at all.

Pangatlo, what if you become attached too much? What if you have invested all your emotions and this man hasn't? What if you remain faithful to him, not entertaining other guys, only to find out that he is seeing other girls?

Isa pang downside ng pseudo-relationships, it is fleeting. When a disagreement sets in, or when one of you gets cold, then that would be the end of it. Unlike in a serious relationship, hindi mo alam kung saan ka lulugar sa isang pseudo-relationship. Wala kang pinanghahawakan. Kasi sa pseudo-relationship, there is no "us." Meron lang "you and me," hindi "us."


Buti sana kung pseudo-pain din lang ang mararanasan mo. Kaso, hindi eh. Real pain. And usually, kahit tapos na ang pseudo-relationship, hindi mo maiwasan umasang one day, may karugtong pa rin iyun. And you will be miserable, hoping to bring back what you used to have, only to find out eventually that the guy is in another pseudo-relationship with somebody else.


Ang hirap, ano? You agreed to this kind of set up for fun and then you'd end up hurting yourself in the process.

Pero puwede naman maiwasan ang pain eh. Puwede naman na hindi mo muna isipin ang future and just enjoy the feeling, without thinking of the consequences.


But if you are certain that you are going to hurt yourself in the process, kailangan mo mamili. You can be happy and live the moment without worrying what would happen next. Or you can stop settling with pseudo-relationships and wait for the real thing.

When I was younger and in a pseudo-relationship with an unavailable guy, a friend told me, "Sige, kung ayaw mong magpapigil, bahala ka. Magpakasaya ka. Pero huwag kang iiyak-iyak pagkatapos, dahil tatadyakan kita."

Ang bottom line lang naman, kung magpapasaya sa iyo, gawin mo. Ihanda mo lang ang sarili mo sa consequence. Dahil ang "parang kayo pero hindi" stage ay bihirang nagiging totoo. Usually, hanggang doon lang siya ... almost, but not quite.